Crossword

Blog Crossword


Try your luck at my very own blog crossword. Just click on the link below and print out the crossword. I hope it works.

Quote of the Day!

To make a long story short Jr. had the day off from school and this afternoon we went to the park. While there Jr. decided to climb a tree. No problem, I climbed trees when I was his age. What I never guessed he would do was jump from this tree. (he doesn't like to jump off of things) He sort of landed on his feet but fell back very hard on his tailbone. OUCH!!! After a while sitting there and getting him to calm down we managed to get back home. So we got home, put ice on his tailbone(it was swelled up about the size of a baseball), took some motrin, called the doctor and he laid down. He wanted to talk to his dad and others (sympathy always makes you feel better) When talking to his grandma on the phone he got real serious and he said " I didn't know jumping from such a small tree could hurt so much!" What a great quote from a six year old with a very sore bottom!

Why wicca?

Thank you to all for your comments. Thank you Krista for your interest in my topic and your questions. I guess I should try to explain why I am thinking about wicca in my life.

I guess this last year has been full of discovery. I have come out as a lesbian and this and other things have opened my eyes to a lot of new things. Growing up in my small Iowa town Christianity was your only option. My family was not super religious but church and sunday school were things I remembered as a child. I guess in high school I got messed up in the wrong crowd and i remember being told that Jesus could help me out of that. I got myself out but went to youth group to learn more about this jesus dude. I guess I had an off again on again relationship with jesus during my teenage years (a lot like my relationship with my parents). Then at a really low point in my life, when I was scared and depressed a friend invited me to church and I embraced being a Christian. Throughout college and into my adult years I was a christian and adopted the views of the Christian pentecostal. For the last few years as I struggled with my marriage and my deep dark secrets about my sexuality I was starting to feel abondoned by God. I reached out more, got involved in a new church but when my marriage fell apart and I was questioning my sexuality my church turned on me. They pretty much kicked me out and told me I was going to hell. I still tried to reach out to God but I felt and continue to feel nothing back. I think I still believe in God or at least a higher power. I guess I want to. I want to believe that after my life here on earth I can go to someplace wonderful but then maybe it doesn't matter. My life has been full of hurt and death lately and although I don't like to admit it, I am depressed. And I think when I am depressed I want to turn to my faith. Have something to believe in that gives me hope. I don't have that anymore and I miss it. I want to have a spiritual side. Something that makes me feel good when nothing else does. So as I am researching different religions I take an interest in wicca. Maybe some of my interest comes from the fact that I think wicca just sounds cool. Like this prayer. It speaks to me.

Hear ye the words of the Star Goddess; she in the dust of whose feet are the hosts of heaven, and whose body encircles the universe:

"I who am the beauty of the green earth, and the white moon among the stars, and the mystery of the waters, call unto thy soul: Arise, and come unto me. For I am the soul of nature, who gives life to the universe. From Me all things proceed, and unto Me all things must return; and before My face, beloved of gods and of men, let thine innermost divine self be enfolded in the rapture of the infinite. Let My worship be within the heart that rejoices; for behold, all acts of love and pleasure are My rituals. And therefore let there be beauty and strength, power and compassion, honor and humility, mirth and reverence within you. And thou who thinkest to seek Me, know that thy seeking and yearning shall avail thee not unless thou knowest the Mystery: that if that which thou seekest thou findest not within thee, thou wilt never find it without. For behold, I have been with thee from the beginning; and I am that which is attained at the end of desire."

Like with any faith jouney it takes time and a lot of reflection. I am starting over again. Maybe wicca is for me, maybe it is not. Time will tell.

Anniversary Weekend

I feel so bad because it is almost the new weekend and I didn't even blog about my wonderful weekend I had last weekend. For all the details you can look at sexy's blog but here is a little bit about it. Last weekend was sexy's and mine 1 year anniversary. We had a great weekend. Friday night I cooked and we just relaxed. Saturday was full of the craft fair and concerts. Sunday was by far the best day I have had in a long time. I made crepes for breakfast and then sexy worked on bags. Then after that sexy took me to dinner at the green zebra. It was great. I was so tickled to be at such a fancy restaurant with my sexy girlfriend. The food was great and the conversation was great. After dinner we headed to go see Girlyman. For those of you who know me you know that I have become a crazy Girlyman fan. Almost as bad as being a crazy Indigo girls fan. So, I was very happy to be going to their concert. Schubas is such a great place to hear them to. You get to be close and the sound was great. They played a lot of songs and I loved them all. It was so nice to be standing there holding my girl and listening to great music. It all seems like a dream now but it is something I will never forget! Thanks sexy for a wonderful anniversary!

The Craft!!

Some of my readers out there are confused. My last few posts have been about wicca. Wicca is a form of a religion I guess you could say. Wicca has peaked my interest lately so I am learning more about it.

What is Wicca?

Wicca, sometimes called "The Craft" or "The Craft of the Wise" is one of many earth-based religions. The religion which is closest to Wicca in America is probably Native American spirituality. Traditional Wicca was founded by Gerald Gardner, a British civil servant, who wrote a series of books on the religion in the 1940's. It contains references to Celtic deities, symbols, seasonal days of celebration, etc. Added to this were components of ceremonial magic and practices of the Masonic Order. A more recent form is eclectic Wicca which involves a combination of Wiccan beliefs and practices, combined with other Pagan and non-Pagan elements. The various traditions of Wicca are part of the Pagan or Neopagan group of earth-based religions.

You can find out more about it by googling wicca or here is a website I have been looking at.

The Wiccan Rede

The Wiccan Rede and Threefold Law:

"Rede" is derived from an Old English word "roedan" which means to guide or direct. 1 One common version of the Rede is:

"An it harm none, do what thou wilt."

"An" and "wilt" are Old English words for "if" and "want to."

The Rede states that a Wiccan is free to do what ever they want to, as long as it does not harm themselves or anyone else. Harm is normally considered to include manipulation, domination, attempts to control, physically injure, emotionally harm, or hurt another person or group in any way.

The Threefold Law (a.k.a. the Law of Return) adds a reward for those who follow the Wiccan Rede, and a punishment for those who violate it. The law states that:

"All good that a person does to another returns three fold in this life; harm is also returned three fold."

Witch???

I have decided I am going to be a witch! Ok, so your laughing at me now. That is ok. As some of you know I have had a hard time this past year dealing with my beliefs. I was at one point in time a strong christian. I still label myself as a christian but something is different now. Granted i was hurt by my last church and those who claimed to be christians and my friends turned their back on me. A part of me doesn't want to be part of a religion that does that. One can say it was just the church I belonged to. There are plenty of churches that are ok with you being a lesbian. True there are but for some reason I just can't bring myself to walk in the doors of another church. The truth is I am unsure of an afterlife, but I want to enjoy my life. Christianity puts so many rules into ones life. I want to be free to do what is good for my life and others. I have really felt a strong pull to the earth lately. I believe in a higher power. I have felt sort of a pull to research wicca. So i have decided that next month I am going to go to a local wicca group and see what it is all about. So now we can add wicca to the list of topics to discuss.

1 year

Thought I would blog now since I will be pretty busy this weekend. I am spending the weekend with sexy. It is our 1 year anniversary. Wow, I can't believe it has been a year. I feel very fortunate to have such a wonderful girlfriend! She is definitely a big joy in my life! Have a good weekend everyone. Love!

Yeah for Tea!!!

I have been sick with a cold this week and been feeling pretty horrible. I was really happy that last week when i went shopping I bought some tea. My tea which is Bigelow Vanilla Chai has brought me joy despite this horrible cold. Yeah for tea!

Joy!!! Take 2!

I have been talking about things that bring me joy lately. It is nice to talk about them because there are so many things that are not bringing me joy and sexy has been very good at reminding me that there are things to be happy about in my life. Yesterday I was talking about doing some cleaning around my apartment. I hate to clean but I also hate messes. When my ex moved out last year he left me with a huge mess. Over the past year I have improved my apartment significantly but there is still a lot of work to be done. Now that my living room, bedroom and bathroom or mostly cleaned and organized it is time to move on to other areas. There is the kitchen....wow, i have a lot of organizing to do there. Then the front room...time to get rid of the rats and haul all that junk out to the dumpster. And then of course Jr's room. Sexy and I were having a conversation about motivating Jr. the other day and she really had some great ideas. I'll get to those in a minute but 1 idea she shared with me a while back is to spend so many minutes a day cleaning and then the task doesn't seem so overwelming. So, Jr and I talked and I told him we were going to spend 30 minutes every night cleaning his room until it was all clean and organized. This is how yesterday after schoool went. Jr. came home and I let him play for 30 minutes. Then he did his homework. (sexy's idea) We then walked to the store and came home and cooked dinner. We ate at the table and talked about his day and what he did at school. We then put the food away and did the dishes. Then it was time to clean his room. I was expecting opposition but I didn't get it. I set my timer for 30 minutes and gave him specific tasks to do and it worked. He was amazed at how much we got done in 30 minutes. The whole evening worked well. He did not grumble about his homework or doing any work. Then after his room we relaxed by watching a movie and then it was bed time. I was so pleased with his good attitude and results. I really hope this continues to work.

JOY!!!

Lately I have been all about finding little things that bring me joy. I have been doing some cleaning and organizing around my house and this makes me happy. Here is something else that brought joy to my day today. It is the new Indiana Jones Movie! I knew one was being made but now it has a title; Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. This now has me very excited. It is not often that you look forward to a movie that won't be coming out for almost another year. I am such a huge Indiana Jones fan. I CAN'T WAIT!!!

Yuck!

My throat hurts, my neck hurts. I am tired and I feel like shit!!! I am going back to bed!

weekend

Thank you Connie and sexy for your encouraging words. I know it has been tough being friends/girlfriend with me lately. I am really hoping for some good things to start happening.

This weekend Connie was in Chicago for a wedding. I picked her up from the airport and then drove her up north were the wedding was taken place. We had made plans to hang out late saturday night and sunday till her plane leaves. So, while she was doing wedding stuff on saturday I finished cleaning my mess I had made going through boxes. I am so pleased. I now have my bedroom, living room and bathroom organized. I only have 3 more rooms to go so i guess I am half way there. It has been a lot of work but I am so pleased and happy with the end result. After cleaning I headed to square dancing. Started back with my class which is learning plus. I already learned plus over the summer so I was mostly bored but it was nice to have adult conversation with people. Then headed to sexy's so she could do some sewing for me. Thanks baby! Dropped jr. off with the babysitter and went home to take out my trash and do my dishes and take a shower. Headed to pick sexy up......wow, was she looking sexy!!! Then picked up Connie and headed for Temptations. I had been there once but sexy and connie had never been. The dancing is ok but it definitely is a different atmosphere than lesbian clubs in the city. I don't mind it but sexy wasn't impressed. I like the less crowded relaxing atmosphere, she likes the crowds and busyness of city clubs so i guess we wont be going there again. We had a good time with Connie. I was pleased to see sexy and connie getting along so well. We ended up back at my place drinking and talking. It was a late night and 9am came very early. We got up and had brunch with friends who are leaving chicago for a while and then ended up at sexy's to play a game. After that Connie packed up her stuff, we had ice cream and headed for the airport. It was sad to see her go. It all happened so fast this weekend. It is hard living thousands of miles away from your best friend. I am so glad we got to see each other and hopefully it will happen again soon.

What a shitty day!!!

As if my life hasn't been shitty enough lately, today just took the cake! There was only one positive part to my day today and that was having lunch with Sexy but even that had its shitty moments. I am tired of rude people, exes, and people deciding my fucking life. Can't I get anyone, just one person to have some pity on me or give me a hug or something. NO! i just get shit and people telling me what i need to do different or where i need to go. Can't i fucking decide myself but then maybe I should let someone else decide my life because right now i feel like i have fucked it up enough!

Deb's Drama

The reason that I have not blogged in a while is due to all the drama happening in my life recently. After coming back from vacation I was hoping to find a job but that didn't happen. My sisters came to visit the last weekend in August and while they were here my grandmother passed away. So, Monday of last week my sisters, jr and I headed for Iowa where I spent most of this last week. I am really getting tired of funerals. This last weekend my parents moved and I was helping them with that. Now I am back in chicago.... Jobless, moneyless and grandparentless!!! Really sucks!!!

Rest of vacation!!!

I know it is weeks later and no one probably cares about the rest of my vacation but i will give a quick ending to it. Day 4 was our trip to Baltimore. Sexy and I went to visit my friend in Baltimore and also her friends. First we went to an interesting art museum, then walked along the inner harbor and enjoyed some ice cream. We then had dinner with my friend and dessert with her friends. It was a quick trip but we managed to fit all our baltimore friends in and it was lots of fun. We got back super late so Friday consisted of sleeping in and then wandering around Reading. We went to the market, a pretzel place, and of course the outlets. I have some nice new bras now!!! Friday night consisted of dinner and games. Nice and relaxing. Saturday morning we got up and headed to sexy's dads for breakfast and conversation. It was a good time and I learned how to play Hand and Foot. Saturday afternoon was the wedding. Sexy's cousin Sarah looked beautiful. The wedding was on the long side but it was very nice. That night was the reception where we ate, drank lots of beer and danced. I had a good time dancing and drinking and talking with sexy's relatives. Pics can be seen on Sexy's flickr site. Sunday we got up and headed for the farm where we spent the night and then returned home Monday evening. Overall it was a good trip and I was sorry it had to end. I enjoy vacations and i am so glad sexy and I vacation well together.